Xanet Pailet
Certified Tantra Educator

Bestselling author of Living An Orgasmic Life: Heal Yourself & Awaken Your Pleasure, Xanet Pailet is a Tantra Educator, Sexological Body Worker and Somatica® trained sex coach who has worked in the therapeutic field for over 25 years. Xanet runs a successful sex & intimacy coaching practice for individuals and couples in the San Francisco Bay Area and teaches several of our Ecstatic Living seminars.

Xanet's teaching approach is holistic, interactive and experiential, and based on her extensive studies under Steve & Lokita Carter, her completion of the SkyDancing Tantra Coach & Teacher Training, as well as her broad experience in sex & intimacy coaching for individuals and couples makes Xanet an exceptional and very popular teacher.

For more information about Xanet's private coaching practice and her book, visit powerofpleasure.com

"this experience was transformational for my spouse and I. It opened us up to a deeper, more trusting, more vulnerable connection. [Xanet] was incredibly knowledgeable, loving, professional, and supportive in eliciting the best experience for each individual."
—Ecstatic Participants (San Francisco, CA)
"Xanet [and her assistant teacher] did a wonderful job facilitating this event! ...Knowledgeable, open, authentic, and really do live the Tantric path. I'd highly recommend this [Level 1] seminar if you're either new to Tantra or simply looking for something fun to do on the weekend!"
—Rob G (Santa Cruz, CA)
"I will definitely follow Xanet into future workshops! I really resonate with her, and with her personal honesty. The safe space she created allowed me to do a lot of powerful work and stay in my body."
—Kathy D (Santa Rosa, CA)
"Wonderful! The weekend overall was amazing! The exercises helped me stay connected with my partner and to learn more about myself. The teachers [Xanet and her assistant teacher] were wonderful, very professional, and sweet."
—Ecstatic Participant (San Francisco, CA)
"This was my first Ecstatic Living course and I would recommend it to everyone, both couples and singles alike! I loved how Xanet [and her assistant teacher] created a safe environment for such a personal and sensitive subject."
—Ecstatic Participant (San Francisco, CA)
"I feel this seminar [taught by Xanet] was both profound for relationship and personal growth. We learned tools to deepen our connection and intimacy as well as to connect with one's self."
—Ecstatic Participant (San Francisco, CA)
“I was skeptical coming into what the experience would be like. But once I did the first meditation which I had never done before, it opened my mind and I just embraced the experience and let go of my expectations and it was amazing! Xanet was the best!”
—Ecstatic Participant (San Francisco, CA)
"[Xanet's] workshop exceeded my expectations. As a therapist I tend to be critical of these types of events. The workshop is experientially focused with teachings interspersed. You won’t get bored. My fiancé and I have implemented the skills learned daily which has enhanced the intimacy of our relationship. It’s a great opportunity to lean into the proverbial edges with your partner and learn additional skills towards more positive outcomes. Bring your partner for a day of growth and play! You won’t be disappointed!"
—Danielle L (Oakland, CA)
"After doing many tantra workshops with Ecstatic Living, I decided to do [Ecstatic Lover™] and was thrilled to discover things I hadn't learned before - new perspectives on how to please a woman."
— K Kelkar (Los Angeles)
"I am an almost 70 year man who has been studying Tantra for about ten years. I am also a tough critic and not easily impressed. During this ten years I have attended a number of Tantra workshops through Ecstatic Living Institute and have never before been able to dive into my own sexuality as well and as profoundly as with the [Ecstatic Lover™] workshop taught last weekend by Xanet, Kai, with assistance by Corrine. The workshop created a sacred container of trust, openness, vulnerability and compassion, and is really for all Lovers, masters and others, who want to understand their sexuality as it is expressed in a relationship. This is an extraordinarily difficult subject for most...and the team was able to navigate superbly from the opening of a relationship through to a culmination of passion, all the while teaching about boundaries, trust and appreciation for the very complex world of sexuality. Through a number of experiential exercises that brought me into awareness of who I am sexually as never before, Xanet and Kai also helped me gain a much better understanding of the complex nuances of women in their love making. In a word, it was WONDERFUL. I am ever grateful to them for bringing this workshop to [us]."
—R Tallman (Singapore)
“Kai and Xanet worked well together and I appreciated their honesty, approachability, wisdom and presence. It was powerful to have the time, space and exercises to connect with my partner in new ways. I learned tools to help us stay connected and tapped into my own passion and desires. Thank you for your wonderful workshop!”
—Amber (Santa Cruz, CA)
“Kai and Xanet are skilled and knowledgeable as they are easy-going and compassionate. It was a day well-spent with my wife and other couples. Now it’s time to go home and have some real sex!”
—Paul Guido (Oakland, CA)
“Kai and Xanet are a great team. They’re both very loving and their workshops are wonderfully delivered.”
—J. King
“What a breath of fresh air and loveliness! Kai and Xanet are compassionate, intuitive and lovely to be around. Their workshop was excellent and I learned so much. It was both practical, spiritual and everything in between. Thank you!”
—44 year-old female, Marriage and Family Therapist
“Kai and Xanet have distilled a dozen techniques from cognitive psychology and tantra into a useful set of practices that all couples can benefit from.”
—Dr. George Baldwin, Professor of Social Psychology
“Kai and Xanet are masters at helping people get to the root of intimacy and their workshop was wonderful! They really helped us build a more solid foundation and helped us create the building blocks for our future. Thank you so much!”
—L. Fontella (Hayward, CA)
“[Everyone] in a restless, stale, disconnected relationship should take this class.”
—J. Adams (San Francisco, CA)
“[Ecstatic Lover™] literally changed my life. I lived in a virtually sexless marriage for over 10 years. Last night I used what I learned from you over the weekend and my wife couldn’t get enough of me. 15 minutes after we made love she came back for more. That never happened before. She was so happy she even told our couples’ therapist about it today.”
—B. McGuire (San Francisco)
“I learned a lot about women and myself and I feel like I have grown not just as a man but as a person as well. And my wife and I haven’t skipped a day of sex since the workshop! Thank you for the unforgettable experience.”
—W. Williams (Oakland, CA)